Crawley Pool League Forum

Tea Break wrote:

Comfortably numb wrote:

Tea Break wrote:

I dont really remember the food at the redz bar.

I think all venues should start serving kronenbourg and forget the food except for 2 venues...

Ram club to carry on serving what they serve (but more of it please cos its good!) and justonebridgeleftcostheothertwogotknockeddownbutdontworryyoucanstillgetyourcheesefromtescos club should carry on with the variety...

I agree. To be honest, when every new season starts, I look for these 2 clubs in the fixtures. I then write them into my diary and when the dates get nearer, I go on hunger-strike. This allows me to savour and fully appreciate the varying alimentary delights on offer.

is the justonebridgeleftcostheothertwogotknockeddownbutdontworryyoucanstillgetyourcheesefromtescos club available for hire? thinking of having a rather swanky get together and think it would make an ideal venue.

I have a garden shed that is available if you have no luck booking the Mould Mecca. My shed is made of wood, smells a bit musty, leaks a bit, and has no heating. I realise it's not a patch on The Cheese Conference centre, but if you commit your swanky do to my shed, I will ensure that I provide air fresheners, paraffin heaters and a tarpaulin over the roof. I can't say fairer than that. Oh, go on then, I'll throw in a box of Twiglets as well. All for £1.20 per evening.

Village_Idiot wrote:

If you throw in Twiglets they will land on the floor and you will have to undertake a clean sweep!!!

I wil throw them into my home then and ensure a full house.

Ronnie wrote:

Comfortably numb wrote:

Tea Break wrote:

is the justonebridgeleftcostheothertwogotknockeddownbutdontworryyoucanstillgetyourcheesefromtescos club available for hire? thinking of having a rather swanky get together and think it would make an ideal venue.

I have a garden shed that is available if you have no luck booking the Mould Mecca. My shed is made of wood, smells a bit musty, leaks a bit, and has no heating. I realise it's not a patch on The Cheese Conference centre, but if you commit your swanky do to my shed, I will ensure that I provide air fresheners, paraffin heaters and a tarpaulin over the roof. I can't say fairer than that. Oh, go on then, I'll throw in a box of Twiglets as well. All for £1.20 per evening.

I will match that offer but I will also throw in a musty unlevel pool table that hasn't been reclothed since Del Barnes won the singles on it in 1968.

You are a hard-nosed businessman Ronnie. I will up the offer and provide whoever books my venue with a £10 voucher to be spent in any branch of Cheeseland, once someone actually starts up such a company with that name.

Village_Idiot wrote:

I will be beer bitc*h

Have you ever thought of a career change VI? How about cheese b!tch?

Ronnie wrote:

That vacancy's already filled thank you very much! But now you mention it, there is a recently vacated opening for onion b!tch.

I would like to apply then. I have a wide ranging knowledge of onions as I grew some in a garden once. I can prove it as well because;

1) I can show you the garden.
2) I can produce an onion.

Brighton 01273
Crawley 01293
Worthing 01903
Portsmouth 0239
Swindon 01793
Glasgow 0141

Here are some STD codes just in case it helps, they sometimes will cover surrounding areas eg Brighton & Hove but not always.

Whatever happened to CJD? Is that anything to do with John Davidson?

Comfortably numb wrote:

Ronnie wrote:

Whatever happened to CJD? Is that anything to do with John Davidson?

I can help here Ronnie. CJD stands for 'Completely John Davidsoned'. If you are CJD you will know it because you will wake up on the floor surrounded by Guinness cans and take-away boxes, and the last 36 years will have been a blur.

Sounds serious. I had RSI once. 'Ringsell Snooker Infection'. Nasty business, I had to dig it out with a needle tip, which Westy very kindly lent me.

I'll avoid the obvious jokes about temporary blindness, but surely the only time you've seen the black was when you played that twat Silly Brian last year. And you didn't f@*king miss then did you!!

Comfortably numb wrote:

Ronnie wrote:

I'll avoid the obvious jokes about temporary blindness, but surely the only time you've seen the black was when you played that twat Silly Brian last year. And you didn't f@*king miss then did you!!

That's because I considered him to be an easy opponent, so there was no pressure. If I was playing VI and/or JD then I'd be shaking, like they always are.

The easy way to beat VI and/or JD is to spike their Guinness with water, that way they become completely disorientated, and in extreme cases their head can explode like that woman off of Total Recall.

But whatever you do don't expose them to sunlight, never feed them after midnight and don't spike their Guinness with more Guinness. That way they become even more impossible than you can powerfully imagine!

Comfortably numb wrote:

Ronnie wrote:

Comfortably numb wrote:

That's because I considered him to be an easy opponent, so there was no pressure. If I was playing VI and/or JD then I'd be shaking, like they always are.

The easy way to beat VI and/or JD is to spike their Guinness with water, that way they become completely disorientated, and in extreme cases their head can explode like that woman off of Total Recall.

But whatever you do don't expose them to sunlight, never feed them after midnight and don't spike their Guinness with more Guinness. That way they become even more impossible than you can powerfully imagine!

I disagree Ronnie. The only way to beat VI is to violate his chips whilst bending his bad arm behind his back. To beat JD, all you have to do is call last orders when he's down on his shot. While he's scuffling with others to get to the bar you put the black over the pocket and drop it in, easy.

The day I have to violate VI or scuffle with JD to win a game of pool is the day I join Teaguey on the fruit machine.

No dis to Teaguey. He's a god on the fruities and good luck to West Ham. They'll need it!

Last edited by Ronnie (2010-03-26 21:28:22)

Tea Break wrote:

I have some website advise (or even advice) could the webmaster think of some ideas to go in the webmaster ideas thread, then give CN some advise on how to play back-side.

I play a lot of back-side. I play a lot of snatch as well. I don't really care as long as my balls go in.

Tea Break wrote:

This would have been much funnier if you handt told me about it before I read it.

I once heard John Virgo say that someone needed a good length and the pink would help. I didnt understand what he meant.

Do you think he was talking about c0ck$ and m!nge$?